Trust

"Jesus replied, 'This is the work (service) that God asks of you: that you believe in the One Whom He has sent (that you cleave to, trust, rely on, and have faith in His Messenger)'".

John 6:29 (Amplified Version)

Give Me Jesus - Fernando Ortega Ruth Graham Tribute

My posts lately have been heavy on the words/thoughts and music and low on the pics.
Sorry.
Haven't had my camera in my hand much since Christmas.
That will be a goal in Feb.
But for now one more song post.

I am off today to prepare for the Women's Retreat I've been talking about.
Off to some time with G I R L S.
Off to some time with J E S U S.
Oh how excited I am.
All will be well here at our house - always is when I'm gone.
I have a rock star husband!


This is the first song on my playlist right now.
Our pastor showed this last week at church.
It's moving.
Moves me to want more of Jesus.
Moves me to want to be that couple that is married for 60+ years and still in love.
Moves me to want to live so my kids will say this of me someday.
Give Me Jesus.
Hope it encourages and moves you too.

I Said I Would Tell You . . .

I posted this picture one day on a "Friday's Five".

I told you someday I might tell you the story.
I decided I'd tell you.

2006 February
Golden Gate Bridge
Running
By now in life, my body had given birth twice.
We had survived the first year of twins - that's the year everyone told us was just "survival".
I'd agree.
Ian was now 3 and a half and the twins were 1 and a half.

I had taken Jason on a 30th b-day surprise trip.
Like really a surprise . . . picked him up from a weekend Jr. High mission trip he was on and he thought we were going out to celebrate his birthday.
We did - we drove to the airport.
He unscrambled the letters to determine our destination and away we went for a few days.
No diapers in our suitcases.

Fast forward on that trip . . . .
We were on the Golden Gate Bridge and started to run.

We kept running and it became surreal to me.
I opened my mouth and said to Jason something that has stuck with me since the moment I said it,
"I feel so ALIVE in my body."
It was a physical feeling, a mental feeling, and a spiritual feeling.
Just the month before I had come very close to a weight goal I had set for myself after the twins.
He knew what I meant.
He knew that after all my body had been through, after all the lack of sleep, I felt full of energy again.
In that same moment I had a secret I had not told him yet.
I was planning to tell him at dinner.
I knew the physical "alive" part of the feeling I felt on the bridge was going to once again leave.
I was expecting baby number 4.
A planned baby number 4 I should say.

The energy did leave me.
It stayed gone for a long time.
Looking back now I'm sure I experienced some post partum depression following her birth.
I probably did after the twins too - but who would have known the difference between the sleep deprivation and depression. :))
One day, about 9 months after Tatum was born, I put to words what I wanted.
I didn't want a perfect body.
I didn't want to keep myself from yummy, delicious food.
I didn't want to be the girl that barely eats because she wants to be a certain size.
I didn't want to be obsessed by exercise or controlling what I was eating.
I didn't want to see a certain number on the scale.
I wanted what I felt on that bridge.

I wanted ENERGY.
I wanted to feel ALIVE in my body.
I wanted to be healthy.
I asked myself what I thought I needed to achieve that.
How could I feel alive when I was tired - four kids in four years - ministry - moving - etc. etc. etc.
Every one's body is different, but I believed it was a balance of several things that would bring me to that place again.
SLEEP - VITAMINS - EXERCISE - HEALTHY FOOD
I've looked at this paper every day since that day.
After this past year I've decided their should be another thing added to it.
DEAL WITH YOUR STUFF
You know . . . . stress, anger, unforgiveness, anxiety, worry . . . . whatever it is.
Since round one of getting healthy again (this was round 2) I had packed on some "stuff" and my body wasn't going to respond to my running, walking, fruit eating life without me dealing with my stuff.
Fast forward again . . . 2010.
2010 is the year I can say I finally started to feel healthy again.
I love looking at this pink sheet.
It reminds me to process what's out of whack when I'm out of energy.
I think I'll keep it their forever reminding me of the day I jogged across the Golden Gate Bridge taking in air and literally feeling ALIVE in my body.
This body is a gift.
I will never weigh what I did on my wedding day.
I will never wear my prom dress again (who the heck would wear that thing?).
I will always have "beauty scars" reminding me of precious lives this body has carried.
But in THIS body I can be healthy, have energy, and FEEL ALIVE.
Thanks 2010 for a year of a road back to "health".

Beautiful YOU!

"There could never be a more beautiful you. 

You were made to fill a purpose that only you could do.

There could never be a more beautiful you.

Don't buy the lies disguises, and hoops they make you jump through.

You were made with such care; your skin, your body, and your hair are perfect just the way they are.

You were made to fill a purpose that only you could do.

There could never be a more beautiful you."

These are a select group of lyrics from the song "More Beautiful You" by Johnny Diaz.

They are my prayer for my birthday girl this week.

She loves to be beautiful. 

We tell her she's beautiful and that God made her with a beautiful heart.

We tell her a person is beautiful when they show kindness.

We tell her all sorts of things about beauty. 

I know she'll be bombarded with all sorts of mixed messages on beauty  as she grows.

I know she's only four but as she grows I pray she knows how beautiful she is to her Creator and that she was made to fill a purpose that only she can fill. 

These lyrics go for you too. 

There could never be a more beautiful YOU!

You were created with a purpose that only YOU can fill.

After years in youth ministry this is my prayer for all the girls I've met along the way.

You are beautiful ! ! ! 

I'm thinking of you all right now!

(Check out all the lyrics here.)

It's a powerful song with powerful lyrics.

Two Thoughts

Quote from "Crazy Love" by Francis Chan (page 31) - I'm reading this book again and going through a study on it with some ladies. I read this line this week and it has stuck with me.

"He (God) already has a name, an identity. We don't get to decide who God is."

Proverbs 3: 5-7  The Message - Read this this morning.  I think I'll think on this today!

Trust GOD from the bottom of your heart;

don't try to figure out everything on your own.

Listen for GOD's voice in everything you do, everywhere you go;

He's the one who will keep you on track.

Don't assume that you know it all.

Run to GOD!